The 7 best white elephant gifts everyone will want to steal this year
Whether or not you’ve heard of a white elephant gift exchange before, there’s a good chance you have the wrong idea of what it is, how it actually works, and where the idea came from. According to legend, the king of Siam gave a white elephant to courtiers who upset them. This was a much more vile punishment than simply executing them. The recipient had no choice but to simply thank the king for such a rich gift, knowing that he probably could not afford the upkeep of such an animal. This would inevitably lead them to financial ruin.
This story is almost certainly false, but it gave rise to a modern holiday staple: exchanging gifts with white elephants. Choosing the right white elephant gift means walking a fine line: the goal isn’t just to buy something awful and force someone to take it home with them. Rather, it should be useful or entertaining enough not to be immediately trashed. The recipient also shouldn’t be able to just toss it in the junk drawer and forget about it. So here are some suggestions that will not only give you a few laughs, but also make the recipient feel (slightly) overwhelmed.
KFC / Enviro-Log
The best white elephant gifts are the ones that create a little intrigue as soon as they enter the gift pile. And a full-size, 4.3-pound pile wrapped in holiday paper is impossible no to notice It will almost certainly outshine any other gift up for grabs and prompt endless questions and speculation about what might be inside the strange, surprisingly heavy box.
The fact that the comically large box contains a KFC Fire Flavored Fried Chicken makes the whole gag even funnier. I have a gas fireplace at home, so unfortunately I have no idea what the KFC 11 herb and spice fire actually smells like. Many online reviews claim it smells “exactly” like the inside of a KFC. Whether you like this or not probably depends on your affinity for the Colonel. But I can’t think of a more delightful gift to give someone who really wants to see what’s inside the big, heavy box. — Carissa Bell, senior reporter
Amysie
Who doesn’t want their living room to look like a galaxy far, far away? Your giftee may have to contend with their young children (or others in your gift exchange) over this galaxy projectorwhich illuminates various lighting effects on the ceiling with adjustable brightness and speed. They can use it to achieve the perfect atmosphere for their next Star Wars viewing party or to wind down to sleep at night. In addition to the included remote and companion app, the projector also has a timer so they can set it to turn off right when they fall asleep. The mobile app will allow them to customize every aspect of their personal space field, from its nebulae and flashing effects, to the swirling colors, to the music they pair with it (yes, there’s a built-in speaker, too). Forget those boring old ones smart bulbs — this galaxy projector is the smart device that will enhance anyone’s home environment. — Valentina Palladino, deputy editor
ChopSabres
Is there really any point to sushi or a noodle night if you don’t consume your food with Force-protected utensils? No. The answer is no. These lightsaber wands light up in different colors at the push of a button and come with batteries included so your gift can protect their plates from the forces of evil. Sure, they’ll be a hit with Star Wars fans, but anyone can find joy in a pair of extra-powerful chopsticks to have impromptu “food fights” between bites of sashimi. — vice president
Engadget
The Phone banana is exactly what you’d expect it to be – a banana that’s also a phone. It might not have a SIM card or service plan attached to it, but your giftee can pair it with their smartphone via Bluetooth so they can ditch that tired $1,000+ handset and start taking calls the right way—with a piece of fruit. In addition to taking and making calls, they can also use the Banana Phone with Google Assistant and Siri to ask about the weather or tell it “Play Cruel Summer by Bananarama.” Yes, the Banana Phone also works as a Bluetooth speaker and has a range of 30 feet, so it can play tunes when it’s not being used for official work. — vice president
Clock
If the purpose of a White Elephant gift is to be a form of humble torture, then Clocky Alarm clock on wheels may be the greatest white elephant gift ever. (Well, except for those weirdos who wake up at 4:30 a.m. every day with bright eyes and fluffy tails.) It’s an alarm clock that, if your giftee tries to hit the snooze button, runs away from it, continuing to beep, telling them in no uncertain terms that it’s time to get up. And every morning they’ll stumble out of bed cursing your name. – Terence O’Brien, former managing editor
An apple
So maybe your recipient will be able to easily toss this in a junk drawer, but we don’t think they’ll want to. Apple’s stupid polishing cloth at a ridiculous price it might actually be a white elephant gift that people would like to receive. Is it too much for what it is? Probably. Is it generally useful to anyone since we all now have dozens of screens, big and small, in our lives? Definitely. Apparently a lot of people saw the usefulness of this thing as there were weeks of waiting to get it back when first released in 2021. Now, thankfully, it’s more readily available—which may be the most important thing for you if you find yourself wandering around the mall or scouring Amazon trying to find the perfect white elephant gift. — vice president
MMX
IRL guns are lame – unless the ammo is sugar based. The MMX Marshmallow Crossbow shoots “slightly dry” marshmallows up to 60 feet, so think of it as a much tastier version of a Nerf gun. Just imagine: one person with this crossbow and a bag of Jet Puffed can deliver sugar bombs to everyone in the room without ever getting off the couch. If that’s not a storybook vacation scenario, I don’t know what is. The launch vehicle itself is highly handcrafted: made of copper, aluminum, natural rubber and North American hardwood, and each one is machined and assembled by hand. In Canada no less. – Amy Schoerheim, reporter
White Elephant FAQ
What is a white elephant?
A white elephant gift exchange is a party game usually played around the holidays where people exchange fun, impractical gifts.
How does the white elephant work?
Each group of people brings one wrapped gift to the White Elephant Gift Exchange, and each gift is usually of a similar value. Then all the gifts are placed together and the group decides the order in which everyone will ask for a gift. The first person chooses a white elephant gift from the pile, unwraps it, and their turn ends. Subsequent players can either decide to unwrap another gift and claim it as their own, or steal a gift from someone who has already taken a turn. The rules can vary from there, including guidelines for how often an item can be stolen – some say twice, max. The game ends when everyone has a white elephant gift.
Why is it called a white elephant?
The term “white elephant” is said to come from the legend of the king of Siam who gave white elephants to courtiers who upset him. Although at first glance it looks like a lavish gift, it is believed that the courtiers will be ruined by the cost of maintaining the animal.
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